Man Wakes Up With Bizarre Face Tattoo Removed

Daniel Fisher woke up at noon last Sunday with a splitting headache after a night of drinking with the lads. “I knew something was up the moment I woke up”, he recalled to us in our exclusive interview. “Like, I had a headache sure, but that was to be expected. It was the fact that the side of my face felt tingly that concerned me”. When Daniel went to look in the bathroom mirror, a terrible sight met his horrified eyes.

“The moment I looked in the bathroom mirror, I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. My beloved facial tattoo was gone!”. (The facial tattoo in question was a bizarre whale that covered most of the left side of his face, with his mouth purportedly representing the whale’s mouth.) “I was in complete shock. I was so proud of my tattoo, I never thought I’d ever do something as stupid as this”

Daniel spent the rest of the day talking to his friends and trying to retrace his steps that Saturday night. “I apparently drank about 2 litres of Captain Morgan’s at prinks’, and then we all headed on into Copper’s. Ben, [a friend] said we left at around two [am] and I still had my tattoo. But, when we arrived at the after-sesh at about 4 [am], Molly [another friend] remembered that the tattoo was gone by then. Sometime in those two hours I must have stumbled into a back-alley tattoo removal place and had it done. Man, I must have been plastered.”

Daniel is still obviously very stressed by the ordeal. “I’m supposed to be getting married next month. When my fiancé finds out I’ve lost my tattoo, I don’t know what she’s gonna do. She loved that whale…..”


Philip Mignon – Turbine Writer

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