You know that door-opens-into-a-portal thing they show in Sci-Fi shows, where a person opens a door and steps into a new realm? The day we opened that door was the 12th of March, because things just became fuzzy from then. Is it just me, or does the sheer number of things I need to do when things go back to “normal” already give you the creeps? Like having to…

Remember How To Get To College

The last I remember; it took me around 20 minutes to walk to college. Did I walk down the main road, or did I cut through the lanes behind the houses? And was there really a German school here? Well, how can you blame me for not remembering when the last time I walked to college, my scarf came halfway up my face, the trees were still barren and the only thing I could think of was getting home to escape the biting cold?

Recognise My Classmates

So, let’s say I somehow hobbled my way to college. But the next problem is, I almost forgot how people look like. Mask-less faces, in particular. To me, everyone looks the same when they wear masks, so how do you expect me to suddenly adapt to seeing people’s complete faces again? Hold on, this guy looks familiar. Now, where did I see him? Right, in my previous life.

How To Log Into Brightspace

People waved to me, which means they recognised me, and that makes me feel horrible. Anyway, I sit down and take out my most beloved friend who has stayed by my side for the past few weeks – my laptop. With a chill down my spine, I realise that I need to open up lecture slides. But how did we access them? I do have a faint, dreaded memory over my cursor hovering above the orange icon. Now, how do you expect me to remember when I have lost track of which week of term it is? I rummage through my bag and find my old planner from the days I knew how to walk to college. Crap, I’m in fourth year already?! No way! Looks like I have to ask these unfamiliar people in the classroom to help me log in.

Wear Sunglasses To The Shops

Now, one of the things that going back to “normal” entails is going for grocery shopping. Heed my good advice and wear sunglasses to the shops. Otherwise, your poor eyes are going to have to bear the brunt of taking in all the colours from the shelves stacked to the brim with a spectrum of products all at once. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Learn To Shake Hands (eek!)

This is probably the most daunting of them all. You see, where I come from we press our palms in front of our chests and say “Namaste”. But it turns out that in other countries they do something else – extend the arms, let their palms fold into that of another person’s and make a jiggly up-and-down motion with them. Didn’t they say that’s how germs spread? And now I have to learn that again? Tsk tsk…

 

Mallika Venkatramani  – Arts & Lifestyle Editor