In a dramatic response to the Australian wildfires that have plagued the New South Wales region since the start of the Southern Hemisphere summer, Treebeard has assembled the Ents of Australia for what could very well be their last march.
Speaking in a press conference before the official launch of the march, Treebeard confirmed that the purpose of the 60 kilometre march (expected to take around 2 days when accounting for the Ents ponderous movement speed), was to raise awareness of the perils of wildfires and climate change. “Nobody cares about the woods anymore” remarked the illustrious man of wood, “and it is easier to shout Stop! Than to do it. But we march because we must, because without imminent action all of Australia’s wilderness could be destroyed. We need to raise awareness of the plight of the woods, and to promote the actions we need to take to save it!”
The Extinction Rebellion have welcomed the awakening of the Ents, and look forward to their participation in the protests against the Morrisson government timed to begin upon their arrival in Canberra. The Morrisson government, meanwhile, has dismissed the Ents as “has-beens”, “trees with ideas above their station”, and “totally delusional about climate change, and this is just a particularly severe wildfire season that has started months earlier than usual and burned 50 times more land in half the time.”
Treebeard concluded his press conference with a call to action for those who wish to save the Australian forests; “The world is changing: I feel it in the water, I feel it in the earth, and I smell it in the air. We must act now if we are to have any hope of stopping our impending doom.”
Shane Clune – Former Turbine Editor